Invisible Child

This week on At Least You Tried we venture into the often baffling world of Lifetime made for TV movies with quite possibly the craziest one of them all, a little film called Invisible Child. This movie is the loving story of your average American family: Father, mother, son, daughter…. and other invisible daughter that exists solely in the mom’s imagination.

Why did Victor Garber‘s character not immediately has his wife committed when she claimed to have this invisible child? On some level does Rita Wilson‘s character know she’s crazy? and does this movie share a cinematic universe with Scott Pilgrim vs the world?

Join us this week as we indulge in this made for TV masterpiece.

(A quick side note: Weren’t Lifetime movies usually about some social issue of the day, like alcoholic spouses or pill addiction? Where did this one come from? Was there a rash of cases of women with imaginary children?)


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Eight Legged Freaks

It’s a rare thing to witness birth of a star, it’s even more rare to see one implode simultaneously. We witnessed just that this week when we saw David Arquette and a young Scarlett Johansson¬†together in the movie Eight Legged Freaks.

Why does the radioactive waste affect the spiders so drastically but not the deputy that smeared it on his head? Why is Bret made up to look like a heroic character later in the film when we witnessed him try to force himself on Ashley not 30 minutes prior? and why does everyone and their mom listen to a local conspiracy theory DJ on the radio?

Your guess is as good as mine as we try to make sense of it all on this weeks episode of At Least You Tried…

 

 


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The Stuff

Are you eating it… Or is it eating you? This week we watched the 1985 B horror movie “The Stuff” and were treated to possibly the best character to ever grace the screen, Mo Rutherford.

Why is the old man who found the stuff content with eating something that’s bubbling up from the ground? Does no one care that Jason skipped school to go mess up a grocery store? How is The Stuff supposed to end world hunger if you “Lose 5 pounds a week” on it? and do lumberjacks in the bathroom come with every room at the motel?

Join us this week for the insanity that is “The Stuff” but remember: Everybody has to eat shaving cream once in a while.


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Killer Klowns from Outer Space

Never has a movie been so divisive for our group with half of us loving it and half of us hating ourselves for willingly viewing it. This week we sat down and watched the cult classic Killer klowns from outer space and I believe Alex may have died a little inside in the process.

Was the clowns murderous rampage really just revenge for a popped balloon animal? How can anyone stand the two annoying brothers that own the ice cream truck? What does the Klown reproductive cycle look like when we know it involves shooting popcorn?

Possibly the largest mystery of them all is how this movie still ranks above 70% on Rotten tomatoes…. Some questions will never be answered.


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Top 5 Doctor Who (reboot) episodes

For this week’s top 5 Jonathan and Caitlin discuss their picks for the top 5 episodes from the Doctor Who reboot.

For a show with enough lasting power to last over half a century there is a plethora of episodes to choose from. Even by narrowing it down to just the reboot the decision is a difficult one but we tried to at least include an episode from each of the recent doctors.

 

 

 


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Jason X

Horror movie month rolls on and this week on At Least You Tried we have JASON IN SPACE!!! Yes this week we are watching the horror sequel Jason X which answers the question: What do you get when you put Jason Vorhees in space? The answer of course is bunch of dead space teens.

If all the other methods of execution didn’t work why didn’t the government just decapitate Jason? Why is he ALWAYS stored with his trusty machete? Is sex ed a prerequisite for passing college in space? and why would sexing up a robot increase your chances of survival?

We search for the nonexistent answers to these questions on this weeks episode of At Least You Tried…


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Halloween III: Season of the witch

The Halloween season is upon us and with it comes a month of nothing but amazingly awful horror films for us here at At Least You Tried.

First up this month is Halloween III: Season of the witch also known as “That one Halloween movie without Michael Myers”. Why is Dan pursuing the case of this evil mask maker, when he’s just a doctor with no real ties to it? Why would Conal Cochran create a robot woman that would assist in foiling his evil plans? Why does no one really care that a large chunk of Stonehenge just randomly disappeared? and honestly why does Dan ask Ellie’s age right before they have sex for the SECOND time?

Our newest member Caitlin joins us this week for the first time as we try to make sense of this beautiful mess of a movie.


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Top 5 Horror sequels

To celebrate the start of October Jonathan and Anthony sat down to discuss their picks for the top 5 horror movie sequels.

Can a sequel ever surpass the original? Are we stuck rehashing the same material that made the original great? In our lists we found 10 movies that stepped away from the original formula to make an experience that is truly memorable.

So take a seat, turn down the lights, and join us while we discuss some truly scary/fun horror movie sequels.

Jonathan’s list

Child’s Play 3
The Devil’s Rejects
Dawn of the dead
Halloween 3: Season of the witch
Army of Darkness

Anthony’s List

Day of the Dead
Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter
A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream warriors
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2
Evil Dead 2


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Monkeybone

Well we all knew it was bound to happen eventually…. Tonight the gang bit the bullet and we watched Tori’s pick for “Best of the worst” month: Monkeybone.

This movie is the new bar for painful movie watching experiences. How could Henry Selick, the director of amazing films like The nightmare before Christmas and Coraline, put out garbage like this? It should have been a red flag to us that this movie was awful after seeing Chris Kattan was a major character in it but nay we ignored that and pushed forward.

Why is America so crazy over a cartoon about monkey character that appears after a kid gets an erection? Why is this cartoon aimed at kids at all? ¬†Why is Julie so quick to believe that her boyfriend is possessing dead Chris Kattan? Is Miss Kitty the only redeemable part of this movie, and seriously what has happened to Brendan Fraser‘s career?

Misery loves company so please join us as we torture ourselves with the finale to “Best of the worst” month: Monkeybone.


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Waterworld

Our “Best of the worst” month continues on with Jake’s pick and he picked Waterworld… Joy.

Considered to be one of the biggest flops of all time this movie is definitely a spectacle to see, so much money put into something so disappointing.

This week we ask ourselves why in a world where food is scarce are cigarettes plentiful? How in the world did the little girl go almost a decade in waterworld without learning to swim? How much of the budget was spent on digitally altering Kevin Costner‘s receding hairline?

All this and the story of how Jake attained the prestigious rank of “Marlboro scout” in this weeks episode of At Least You Tried.


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