We’re Back! A Dinosaur’s Story

Sometimes people remember movies very fondly and gloss over it’s errors riding high on their nostalgia. Some here at At Least You Tried had this happen with We’re Back! A Dinosaur’s Story, insisting this movie was great without having seen it recently (Rhymes with Jake). Well after seeing it this week….Meh

The movie isn’t the worst we’ve seen but it definitely isn’t GOOD

For starters why are herbivore dinosaurs eating hotdogs? Why is cereal the plot device that makes our heroes smart? and could we make our villain any more villainous? He’s a spooky magician that only talks about fear and signs blood contracts (no joke) with children.

This movie also hasn’t aged well. Where as your average Disney film has a plot that stays with you years after you’ve seen it We’re Back! has the loosest of plots that involves getting dinosaurs to a museum but also orphans that want to join the circus and a radio that hears the wishes of children?

Much like the dinosaurs in this film, this movie might just be best left in the past.

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It should be abundantly clear at this point that us here at At Least You Tried don’t like ourselves… That is the only logical explanation for why we willingly watched Foodfight!. Most of us have seen this “movie” multiple times. We clearly hate ourselves.

Where to begin? This movie is the biggest bomb we’ve ever reviewed, not just because it’s trash but also this movie was doomed financially from the start. The computer the movie was being created on was stolen decently far into it’s development and they had no back ups at all. Rather than just call it quits they decided to start over from scratch and redo EVERYTHING. I mean why wouldn’t you when you have a film that is guaranteed Oscar bait like Foodfight? In the end this film cost them $45,000,000 to make and made under $75,000.

All that aside, this film is an exercise in insanity. An adventure in a grocery store where all the brand icons you know and love have to team up to stop the evil “Brand X” products from taking over the store. The premise is simple enough but it goes off the deep end when you factor in that this film includes:
– A Brand X icon that is simply just a woman who dresses in fetish gear.
– Multiple adult references and innuendo using food puns
– No joke Nazi references. No hyperbole, no joke Nazi references. We get goose stepping Brand X goons that say they want to get rid of “Inferior brands” all while wearing Nazi uniforms with an X instead of a swastika

This really is a seeing is believing experience so join us this week as we repeatedly ask ourselves “How did this possibly get approved?” and sit down and watch Foodfight!

Foodfight! stars Charlie Sheen, Wayne Brady, Hilary Duff, and Eva Longoria.

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Bee Movie

I’m a Bee!

With possibly the strangest plot of any movie we’ve done so far, we’re going to start off a month of animated films with Bee Movie. It’s one part rom com and one part courtroom drama, this movie doesn’t know what it wants to Bee.

The return of Jerry Seinfeld to the public eye, this movie was supposed to Bee a smash hit and they put 150 million behind it. However, unsurprisingly it flopped and they lost a lot of money on this movie. So why did it flop?

Well elephant in the room here: How is Vanessa, a human female, attracted to a bee? How does that work? How can you expect a long relationship when he’s a bee with a tiny lifespan? and do they have sex? What would that entail?
…This movie is a mess

Bee/ Human relationships and shaky plots aside, this movie is plagued with issues. It has a ton of big name stars that aren’t really used in any capacity. It was almost like they were throwing money at big name voice actors to come in and say two lines only to then disappear from the movie. Also it’s tone was really off for a movie aimed at children. Jokes about jazz and drag queens, as well as not so subtle references to slavery and gas chambers are bound to go unrecognized by kids.

Make your own judgments though and join us this week as we dive into the limitless bounty of awful jokes and bee puns that Bee Movie provides. Come see what all the buzz is about.

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White Chicks

Alex’s month of movie picks comes to a close with a movie that shows that seeing truly is believing. With special effects/ make up that look like the bastard child of The Mask and Disney World’s Hall of presidents White Chicks was especially cringe worthy.

How do our two main characters make the jump in logic from botching a protection job to thinking they can fix the situation by just taking the girls spot? How is Terry Crews possibly attracted to Marlon Wayans when he’s dressed as a woman? and possibly the most baffling question, How did this movie gross 69 million dollars?

So don’t have a BF* because it’s triple T K A** as we sit down and (unfortunately) watch White Chicks.

*Bitch Fit
** Time to totally kick ass

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